I had a sudden feeling of discomfort some alarming cry inside of me saying that the time is passing and passing really fast and I’m no where near what I want to reach, usual symptoms of a classic panic attack,
so after squash I thought I need to take a walk by the see to clear my mind and think out loud, as I was walking I stumbled by a fishing net which cut of my string of thoughts for few minutes tell I set my self free, and then drowned back in my thoughts and worries,
as the tide was جزر in the distance I could see a cement port immerging from the water, I walked to it and I started walking inside reaching the edge looking at the black see dark and dead, I stood there thinking of the unknown of tomorrow and what tomorrow may bring,
my anxiety grew more and more so I turned back and started walking towards the shore, at that moment my thoughts has changed I become so alert and there was one though crossing my mind and it kept repeating it self “I’m not falling, I’m not falling, I’m not falling” as my face came closer and closer to the ground, Yes I slept and fall on my A** !! Lying there on that concrete floor wet and covered with traces sand, I started laughing, yes it’s my luck how can I escape it, it’s better that I just take in,
I laughed so hard that the smile stayed with me till this morning of course the fall pain is multiplied by the next day so I have a souring pain in my B*** to better describe it, you know when you get injection over there and you can’t sit? That’s exactly how it feels
I better quite worrying so much beside you never know what may cross your way, the most important thing is that you live it, cause it’s totally yours :D
Cheers,
O
so after squash I thought I need to take a walk by the see to clear my mind and think out loud, as I was walking I stumbled by a fishing net which cut of my string of thoughts for few minutes tell I set my self free, and then drowned back in my thoughts and worries,
as the tide was جزر in the distance I could see a cement port immerging from the water, I walked to it and I started walking inside reaching the edge looking at the black see dark and dead, I stood there thinking of the unknown of tomorrow and what tomorrow may bring,
my anxiety grew more and more so I turned back and started walking towards the shore, at that moment my thoughts has changed I become so alert and there was one though crossing my mind and it kept repeating it self “I’m not falling, I’m not falling, I’m not falling” as my face came closer and closer to the ground, Yes I slept and fall on my A** !! Lying there on that concrete floor wet and covered with traces sand, I started laughing, yes it’s my luck how can I escape it, it’s better that I just take in,
I laughed so hard that the smile stayed with me till this morning of course the fall pain is multiplied by the next day so I have a souring pain in my B*** to better describe it, you know when you get injection over there and you can’t sit? That’s exactly how it feels
I better quite worrying so much beside you never know what may cross your way, the most important thing is that you live it, cause it’s totally yours :D
Cheers,
O
2 comments:
LOOOOL ... Girl you are one of a kind ....
I guess the moral of your story is .... we get scared and disoriented as we are falling down ... when we reach rock bottom we will laugh out loud and then get up shake the dirt off even if traces are left, we'll walk it off. Tomorrow is definetly a brighter day but with a slight pain in our B**** :D
PS. It is not over yet
Yes that what got me relaxed, when you start thinking so narrow, you miss seeing the whole picture, enshallah we still have time even if it was only today and it would be a shame to waste it in worries, you chose your way, you don’t know what may happen to you, good or bad, at least you’ve done it plus a little souvenir from fate so that you’ll remember the journey :’)
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