If any one had a one look on my face at that moment they would’ve known…
2:15 :’)
received the acceptance of my project upon three days of reviews, once I send the files enshallah I’ll be free and able to enjoy my holiday
2:17 :’(
as I was preparing the final files for submission….. guess what?? It’s not really hard wallah to guess,
over the years I’ve been going through the same lovely events, as if it’s a ritual, a tradition, as if it’s a part of all my projects ever since college, there is this kind of a magnet in my work that it self destruct and it just select the most perfect moment,
Yeah you are right, the software crashed!!!! How bloody typical, my usual self talk would contain sentence like,
this can’t be happening to me,
no no no,
and all those state of denial terms, this time for some reason it felt normal, I lost all access to my two weeks of work, there is no time for self talk, only action,
First question comes in to mind is, back up!!
"In colleague, I used to laugh at one of my professors, she had 5 different back up terms that are completely independent and unrelated starting with high tech ending with basic, Boy how wrong was I???!?!"
Going back to the back up, my last back up was dated October 8th, now my panic attack is at full charge!!!
I feel that I’ve experienced partial memory loss at that moment, what have I’ve done since Monday?? Tons of tiny little things
That’s the part which sucks about the way I work, start with the bulk do the main body then refine refine refine, how am I supposed to remember all those little tiny details I’ve been making??? God they are so many and all should be done like hmmm…. right now!!!!!
Prayers, lots of prayers, Oh god, what can I do? Should I tell my manager, I’ll blame him!! Don’t know why but it’s his fault!!!! Maly she’3el ;(
God I can’t think any more….
Tried again and again, checking back files, trying work around, every damn trick in the book,
And then al7mdellah ya rab, it worked :’) “currently suffering of post trauma symptoms manifesting them selves in the form of a category red headache”
Finally they got submitted….
Some of self assurance thoughts that I had as my ordeal was taking place:
That is a good thing, maybe I made a huge mistake and now when I redo it I’ll fix it, very lame,
That is a good thing, maybe god wants me to avoid a brutal accident by which I’d lose, esmellah 3lay, both my legs, so instead I’ll be stuck at home during 3eyd, that was a bit comforting,
That is a good thing, maybe god wants me to come back to the company next week where I’ll meet my future, my long waited one and only, that was a happy thought :’)
Happy 3eyd o enshallah kil 3am o ento eb’7yer :’)
Cheers,
O
Showing posts with label Work. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Work. Show all posts
Friday, October 12, 2007
Sunday, September 23, 2007
Still
Back to Ahmadi, again!, to avoid the madness, this time through 9ab7an,
there was something in the still distance of the ever yellow desert,
water was over flowing from the ground,
and a pool was forming as the water kept on pouring from that square hole,
I wanted to call 777 to tell them about it, so they can come and do something, but I didn’t, remembering few incidents with the “defenders of the weak” made me think of all possible excuses not to call, I came up with a couple:
What if by the time they arrive “if ever” the water finish!! ey’7ali9 and with our sun, it will be dried in no time, if I get to make those people come here without finding any thing they’d probably charge me with “ez3ag solo6at” !! mesakien I made them move!!!
It’s happening in the desert why can’t I let the poor land drink some water, it must be really thirsty
By the time I’ve reached the second excuse I’ve already passed it by and without doing anything (shame on me)
…….
Walking in to the office and “he” was sitting there wearing a red polo shirt listening to M7md 3bd elwahab, Ana w el 3aZab w hawak = Me and the suffering and your love, I looked at him
“I didn’t know…”
“don’t think I’ll be in pain, not any more, I’m sending you off, for a year on the other end of the world”
“will I be back?”
I woke up, god that was scarey!!! I guess that was coming from my feeling of guilt,
If I hate someone, I believe that gives them the absolute right to hate me back, but to love me as I hate them, that is just unfair,
I was asking god that eysa’7rah ley
Bas ‘7ala9, 6ofart minah, athaney
And there is no way I can think of or imagine to deal with this person!!!
My work has a great area in my life, and as he exists in it, then he exists in my life,
Oh my god what can I do??!!?!? ;-(
……
Taking cautious steps and searching for them, looking in to the faces of woman, spreading around setting on the floor, in front of each a plastic cup of water and few dates, some would have a piece of bred others would hold in there hands leaves of ray7an, and it’s so calm, I can’t hear what they say as if it’s a still picture,
Young women holding their child to their breasts,
Old women setting quietly leaning to the grand columns,
Some women would go around to give, water, food, a smile
It’s time now, I couldn’t find them, I walk back to my place,
Standing by my side, I hear a trembling voice, a cry and a prayer, I can hear what she is asking, I know what she is praying for and my heart cries with her a silent cry, pleading for her daughter, may god answer your prayers dear mother…
And we pray,
with each movement, I hear the clouds moving,
the sound when they are racing before a storm,
and it’s glory alarms my heart, in an instant tranquility, and I blend in…
Hands reaching, grapping the black fabric, holding, unyielding, it’s so great and powerful, beyond sound, beyond tears, I see the cry in their tightened hands
Cheers,
O
there was something in the still distance of the ever yellow desert,
water was over flowing from the ground,
and a pool was forming as the water kept on pouring from that square hole,
I wanted to call 777 to tell them about it, so they can come and do something, but I didn’t, remembering few incidents with the “defenders of the weak” made me think of all possible excuses not to call, I came up with a couple:
What if by the time they arrive “if ever” the water finish!! ey’7ali9 and with our sun, it will be dried in no time, if I get to make those people come here without finding any thing they’d probably charge me with “ez3ag solo6at” !! mesakien I made them move!!!
It’s happening in the desert why can’t I let the poor land drink some water, it must be really thirsty
By the time I’ve reached the second excuse I’ve already passed it by and without doing anything (shame on me)
…….
Walking in to the office and “he” was sitting there wearing a red polo shirt listening to M7md 3bd elwahab, Ana w el 3aZab w hawak = Me and the suffering and your love, I looked at him
“I didn’t know…”
“don’t think I’ll be in pain, not any more, I’m sending you off, for a year on the other end of the world”
“will I be back?”
I woke up, god that was scarey!!! I guess that was coming from my feeling of guilt,
If I hate someone, I believe that gives them the absolute right to hate me back, but to love me as I hate them, that is just unfair,
I was asking god that eysa’7rah ley
Bas ‘7ala9, 6ofart minah, athaney
And there is no way I can think of or imagine to deal with this person!!!
My work has a great area in my life, and as he exists in it, then he exists in my life,
Oh my god what can I do??!!?!? ;-(
……
Taking cautious steps and searching for them, looking in to the faces of woman, spreading around setting on the floor, in front of each a plastic cup of water and few dates, some would have a piece of bred others would hold in there hands leaves of ray7an, and it’s so calm, I can’t hear what they say as if it’s a still picture,
Young women holding their child to their breasts,
Old women setting quietly leaning to the grand columns,
Some women would go around to give, water, food, a smile
It’s time now, I couldn’t find them, I walk back to my place,
Standing by my side, I hear a trembling voice, a cry and a prayer, I can hear what she is asking, I know what she is praying for and my heart cries with her a silent cry, pleading for her daughter, may god answer your prayers dear mother…
And we pray,
with each movement, I hear the clouds moving,
the sound when they are racing before a storm,
and it’s glory alarms my heart, in an instant tranquility, and I blend in…
Hands reaching, grapping the black fabric, holding, unyielding, it’s so great and powerful, beyond sound, beyond tears, I see the cry in their tightened hands
Cheers,
O
Thursday, August 30, 2007
Enshallah!!
If I wrote this yesterday after the first encounter this would be something like,
“What the heck?! What kind of a world we live in, no morals no ethics no conscious??? Blah blah blah”
And I’ll go on and on loaded with anger and frustration, acting as if I was a sleep and suddenly woke up, tartata, and found my self in Kuwait!!
As if I didn’t spend the last quarter of a century in this land
As if it never happened before and I never heard of it
As if evil has JUST reveled it self
You know what now after I calmed down a bite, mo meny but from lack of sleep and self starvation followed by a continues state of food fag3ah,
I know if I wrote that and posted it, it would be “shame on me”
Walla min 9iji shino hal amnesia walla hal hallucination that I have about people and this country?!
It would be that I’m kidding myself and having myself in a constant state of denial
Grow up woman, yes people lie, yes people cheat and hell yes their motto is “I and after me comes the Flood”
Now days that’s what they call common sense, hatha el 6abey3ey, what’s wired and what’s shocking is to find someone who’d act differently and that’s either called naive or safyeh!!
You only get to live this life once and I no matter what the gains or the “stuff” that I may get, I’d rather not live that life at all if it was in those people brains, al7mdellah I’m me, when I think of it those who may sound on the outside successful and getting what they want in that way, then Thanks but no thanks, keep your things to you I don’t want it that way, I happen to have something called conscious, probably you haven’t heard of it!!
I’d ask my self why? and I’d answer, cause they are week and sick, they are afraid and in the end only lying to them selves and it’s easy so easy to do that
You can lie, you can scream, you can swear, you can cheat, you can pick the phone and get your big W
It’s no brainier and not that hard, I and an 8 year old can do the same
But guess what I choose not to, I choose to do things right even when that’s defined in this time and age as stupidity, I choose to not lower my self to that level
And that is hard; what’s easy is to be you...
It’s easy to be 7ayawan but the hard thing is to be Ensan
You made your choice and I’ve made mine
Today is my two years work anniversary, so I’m at two years old in the real world, and I am happy that what ever I faced didn’t swallow me in on the contrary it only made me stronger
Al7mdellah,
O
“What the heck?! What kind of a world we live in, no morals no ethics no conscious??? Blah blah blah”
And I’ll go on and on loaded with anger and frustration, acting as if I was a sleep and suddenly woke up, tartata, and found my self in Kuwait!!
As if I didn’t spend the last quarter of a century in this land
As if it never happened before and I never heard of it
As if evil has JUST reveled it self
You know what now after I calmed down a bite, mo meny but from lack of sleep and self starvation followed by a continues state of food fag3ah,
I know if I wrote that and posted it, it would be “shame on me”
Walla min 9iji shino hal amnesia walla hal hallucination that I have about people and this country?!
It would be that I’m kidding myself and having myself in a constant state of denial
Grow up woman, yes people lie, yes people cheat and hell yes their motto is “I and after me comes the Flood”
Now days that’s what they call common sense, hatha el 6abey3ey, what’s wired and what’s shocking is to find someone who’d act differently and that’s either called naive or safyeh!!
You only get to live this life once and I no matter what the gains or the “stuff” that I may get, I’d rather not live that life at all if it was in those people brains, al7mdellah I’m me, when I think of it those who may sound on the outside successful and getting what they want in that way, then Thanks but no thanks, keep your things to you I don’t want it that way, I happen to have something called conscious, probably you haven’t heard of it!!
I’d ask my self why? and I’d answer, cause they are week and sick, they are afraid and in the end only lying to them selves and it’s easy so easy to do that
You can lie, you can scream, you can swear, you can cheat, you can pick the phone and get your big W
It’s no brainier and not that hard, I and an 8 year old can do the same
But guess what I choose not to, I choose to do things right even when that’s defined in this time and age as stupidity, I choose to not lower my self to that level
And that is hard; what’s easy is to be you...
It’s easy to be 7ayawan but the hard thing is to be Ensan
You made your choice and I’ve made mine
Today is my two years work anniversary, so I’m at two years old in the real world, and I am happy that what ever I faced didn’t swallow me in on the contrary it only made me stronger
Al7mdellah,
O
Monday, August 27, 2007
What the #*?# ?
I got this request and at first I didn’t pay attention to the chain of emails, few days later as by chance I expanded the browser I read that Mr. Coordinator, was looking for someone other than me to do the job, but unfortunately for him, there is no one other than me in the entire country, and with his dam luck I happen to get the damn email he sent and not only to my people but he also cced it to his people!!!
my first impression was why??
I gave my clients an AA treatment put them there on the top, answered to all their needs no matter how trivial or complicated they’ve been, been nicest as I could ever been, I’m not even that with people I love!!! And I give and give and that’s what I get?!!!
I believe that god let me know about that for a reason, so this time there is no miss nice, I took the email and highlighted his stupid sentence and simply asked WHY???
I’m waiting for the answer, but no matter what it could possibly be, I’m telling you from now it’s not going to be good enough, I give my 150% 24/7 and that’s what I get??
What the hell is wrong with the people??
You do your best, and they reward you with extra work
You do your best and they reward you with hardly any appreciation what so ever
You do your best and they reward you with taking you for granted as if, what’s the big deal?
I’ll tell you what’s the big deal, the big deal when I’m gone who the hell do you think would do what am I’m doing with an oversized conscious??
I sent that I’m going for a crash course, it’s a two weeks course crashed in 5 days, and the answer would be can you work remotely??
Me Miss Stupido would say, Yes if it’s urgent
You know what, F#?*# me I truly deserve it
For those of you working in this country I suggest that they would give new employees a manual with their work ID, where it would illustrate to them what the true nature of working in Kuwait
First, Never come on time, who does that?
Second, its very important that you get proper nutrition, so take an hour or maybe two for your breakfast and if you are staying late, then how about launch?
Third, Don’t do any work, the recipe you can start by saying I don’t know and when they assign you something take a very long time to do it and do it all wrong, few years later when they assign you work again, say it’s out of my domain I have a higher experience to do these kind of things
Opps I think I better stop, I got the replay from the guy, it turned out that it was a “language issue” he wrote it wrong, I believe him, his English sucks, oh my god I’m so embarrassed, Sorry!!
And look at the irony at the same time I got a thank you email from my manager as a recognition for my contributions
Me the Hablah :-P I guess my Negative energy vibrated over the gulf spreading horror every where ; )
Cheers,
O
my first impression was why??
I gave my clients an AA treatment put them there on the top, answered to all their needs no matter how trivial or complicated they’ve been, been nicest as I could ever been, I’m not even that with people I love!!! And I give and give and that’s what I get?!!!
I believe that god let me know about that for a reason, so this time there is no miss nice, I took the email and highlighted his stupid sentence and simply asked WHY???
I’m waiting for the answer, but no matter what it could possibly be, I’m telling you from now it’s not going to be good enough, I give my 150% 24/7 and that’s what I get??
What the hell is wrong with the people??
You do your best, and they reward you with extra work
You do your best and they reward you with hardly any appreciation what so ever
You do your best and they reward you with taking you for granted as if, what’s the big deal?
I’ll tell you what’s the big deal, the big deal when I’m gone who the hell do you think would do what am I’m doing with an oversized conscious??
I sent that I’m going for a crash course, it’s a two weeks course crashed in 5 days, and the answer would be can you work remotely??
Me Miss Stupido would say, Yes if it’s urgent
You know what, F#?*# me I truly deserve it
For those of you working in this country I suggest that they would give new employees a manual with their work ID, where it would illustrate to them what the true nature of working in Kuwait
First, Never come on time, who does that?
Second, its very important that you get proper nutrition, so take an hour or maybe two for your breakfast and if you are staying late, then how about launch?
Third, Don’t do any work, the recipe you can start by saying I don’t know and when they assign you something take a very long time to do it and do it all wrong, few years later when they assign you work again, say it’s out of my domain I have a higher experience to do these kind of things
Opps I think I better stop, I got the replay from the guy, it turned out that it was a “language issue” he wrote it wrong, I believe him, his English sucks, oh my god I’m so embarrassed, Sorry!!
And look at the irony at the same time I got a thank you email from my manager as a recognition for my contributions
Me the Hablah :-P I guess my Negative energy vibrated over the gulf spreading horror every where ; )
Cheers,
O
Sunday, August 26, 2007
Work Blabber
I have challenged my self to complete the project from hell, it ended up having this title since I got a "she devil" with the package, and for the fact that it ended up not as good as it started,
the thing about this new experience is that it did tested my so called "experts" and I learned few valuable lessons, first of all, always account for unexpected items in your time line definition, finish early you’ll be praised finish late you’ll be condemned, other than that with some extra time, you can fine tune your work, my style, I always complete the bulk first then start shaping and fine tuning
Second, thinking outside the box could be the answer, this time following the rules didn’t work, only when I stepped back and thought openly, that was a drastic measure for the rules most obedient person
Third, depending on others is not a good idea, in the end I’ve wasted precious time explaining for them and waiting for a replay that never come, anticipating and disappointment plus stupidity, very irritating!!
And yes heard it before couple of months ago and tested it again, I think I’m really calm, though I erupt like a volcano inside but some how, I got to leach the beast and stay very polite and calm, well guess its not too let to develop some habits :’)
In my life I have this “character” at work which I have to deal with, unfortunately, we kicked it off well, as any well behaving strangers will, but as time progresses and as we deal with each other more we ended up on opposite sides, managed to avoid each other for a very long time, but as of today I’ll have to deal with this person AGAIN!! May god give me help and serenity, to deal with this mans crap!!
I just needed to clear my thoughts; these enshallah next two weeks should be hectic, work wise,guess summer has officially done
Cheers,
O
the thing about this new experience is that it did tested my so called "experts" and I learned few valuable lessons, first of all, always account for unexpected items in your time line definition, finish early you’ll be praised finish late you’ll be condemned, other than that with some extra time, you can fine tune your work, my style, I always complete the bulk first then start shaping and fine tuning
Second, thinking outside the box could be the answer, this time following the rules didn’t work, only when I stepped back and thought openly, that was a drastic measure for the rules most obedient person
Third, depending on others is not a good idea, in the end I’ve wasted precious time explaining for them and waiting for a replay that never come, anticipating and disappointment plus stupidity, very irritating!!
And yes heard it before couple of months ago and tested it again, I think I’m really calm, though I erupt like a volcano inside but some how, I got to leach the beast and stay very polite and calm, well guess its not too let to develop some habits :’)
In my life I have this “character” at work which I have to deal with, unfortunately, we kicked it off well, as any well behaving strangers will, but as time progresses and as we deal with each other more we ended up on opposite sides, managed to avoid each other for a very long time, but as of today I’ll have to deal with this person AGAIN!! May god give me help and serenity, to deal with this mans crap!!
I just needed to clear my thoughts; these enshallah next two weeks should be hectic, work wise,guess summer has officially done
Cheers,
O
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
7
I can not tolerate stupidity!!!
I’m supposed to receive help from an “expert” whom all I get from is waste of time and energy, it has been 7 days of back and forth consultations which I keep repeating my self, like twice a day in different style each time لعل و عسى that idiot would understand, but no تأبى المرؤه I’d better go make my self a child wait till it grows up and then ask him before my so called “expert” would give me an answer!! And after all that pain, I walla scream when I get an email from him, if there is a gage on my nerves it would have been broken since day one, on the seventh day, I get the following email,
Hi,
I am tied up this week…..
In the meantime, can you get assistance from …..?
Why the hell you haven’t said that before !?!?!?
Am I supposed to go through explaining process all over again!!!
Just shoot me
On the way home on the radio some dump مذيع was interviewing this guy about Kuwait latest earthquake, it’s a 4.3 for god’s sake, haven’t you seen what happened in Pure those poor poor people having a 7.7 degrees and 400 reversing quakes after which left 200,000 homeless, there where an entire family lives only on 5 dollars a week, here فاضين Kuwaitis made it a salfah, so the مذيع asks questions that a 10 year old would know the answer to and the guy would replay with “terms” and definitions, until the hot shot مذيع asks; what degree would be considered dangerous and distractive? Finally a sensible question, guess what was the long detailed answer about? “We are not able to forecast earthquakes” are you kidding me?!
It was a straight easy question, given that you are the “expert” I believe a simple figure should cover it, but I believe he used a method called divertion, just like my “expert” used with me to divert me, he diverted the topic so that he doesn’t have to replay “I don’t know”
Man you are on a "radio" interview we don’t "see" you, abuse the situation, google it!! I did and the answer is 7
Cheers,
O
P.S.
For further details on Earthquake Severity
Richter Earthquake
Magnitudes Effects
Less than 3.5 Generally not felt, but recorded.
3.5-5.4 Often felt, but rarely causes damage.
Under 6.0 At most slight damage to well-designed buildings. Can cause major damage to poorly constructed buildings over small regions.
6.1-6.9 Can be destructive in areas up to about 100 kilometers across where people live.
7.0-7.9 Major earthquake. Can cause serious damage over larger areas.
8 or greater Great earthquake. Can cause serious damage in areas several hundred kilometers across.
I’m supposed to receive help from an “expert” whom all I get from is waste of time and energy, it has been 7 days of back and forth consultations which I keep repeating my self, like twice a day in different style each time لعل و عسى that idiot would understand, but no تأبى المرؤه I’d better go make my self a child wait till it grows up and then ask him before my so called “expert” would give me an answer!! And after all that pain, I walla scream when I get an email from him, if there is a gage on my nerves it would have been broken since day one, on the seventh day, I get the following email,
Hi,
I am tied up this week…..
In the meantime, can you get assistance from …..?
Why the hell you haven’t said that before !?!?!?
Am I supposed to go through explaining process all over again!!!
Just shoot me
On the way home on the radio some dump مذيع was interviewing this guy about Kuwait latest earthquake, it’s a 4.3 for god’s sake, haven’t you seen what happened in Pure those poor poor people having a 7.7 degrees and 400 reversing quakes after which left 200,000 homeless, there where an entire family lives only on 5 dollars a week, here فاضين Kuwaitis made it a salfah, so the مذيع asks questions that a 10 year old would know the answer to and the guy would replay with “terms” and definitions, until the hot shot مذيع asks; what degree would be considered dangerous and distractive? Finally a sensible question, guess what was the long detailed answer about? “We are not able to forecast earthquakes” are you kidding me?!
It was a straight easy question, given that you are the “expert” I believe a simple figure should cover it, but I believe he used a method called divertion, just like my “expert” used with me to divert me, he diverted the topic so that he doesn’t have to replay “I don’t know”
Man you are on a "radio" interview we don’t "see" you, abuse the situation, google it!! I did and the answer is 7
Cheers,
O
P.S.
For further details on Earthquake Severity
Richter Earthquake
Magnitudes Effects
Less than 3.5 Generally not felt, but recorded.
3.5-5.4 Often felt, but rarely causes damage.
Under 6.0 At most slight damage to well-designed buildings. Can cause major damage to poorly constructed buildings over small regions.
6.1-6.9 Can be destructive in areas up to about 100 kilometers across where people live.
7.0-7.9 Major earthquake. Can cause serious damage over larger areas.
8 or greater Great earthquake. Can cause serious damage in areas several hundred kilometers across.
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